Filter

I was born in Philadelphia Pennsylvania and, plan on going back sometime soon... I know that's were my heart leads me. So, I can finish up my journey there, a journey that has lead me to this dream, of becoming a Paraprofessional Teacher Assistant. My road's has become quite stumpy. But, I have figured out how to dodge a few. And still working continuously on the others. So, I can see a much bigger picture, then what others see for me. I shall go through tunnels, to avoid the unnecessary bumps in my path...Lucifer wants to, see me fail. But, I am not going to make him proud. My silence is golden... some people never thought I could carry out this dream. And I should be very damn proud of it too. Why a matter of fact I am. So, why aren't most people, proud of me too. Like, Martin Luther King onces said: I have a dream, and that he did. But, everyone's dreams are quite different. Therefore, I won't carry a filter through my journey. And if there is a hole that: Lucifer placed to keep me away, I will give him a piece of my mind. This mind will be uncensored. And no its not carrying filth that your imaging. I have been quiet for so long, and now it's time for me, to finally speak. So, this life I am living behind these closed doors, can finally breathe. I will continue to carry my heart on my sleeve. But, you better not disrespect me, or the tables will definitely turn. So, I will leave it up to: our almighty creator God... I am going to continue on this path, which I have drawn. I will continue to remain strong, even if my soul is cut deep. And my heart just can't take it anymore, I will cleanse my soul. Like, the rain cleanse the Earth. No filter ya, No filter... I am going to make sure, I complete this journey.

Dear Regina

Today, I had stop by to, pay my best friend a visit. No! I did not shed tears---I didn't want to open up a wound. But, every once in a while, I do hear her voice. And its nothing like, her voice on Earth. So, how do I know it's her? I feel it through my heart and my soul, and that's how I know. Three years has gone pass, and within my heart and soul, I know the truth of how everything went down...the truth never lies. And I don't need to be around to figure it all out. Should I speak the truth, or allow the universe reveal it to you? Why let me just tell you. It Nov 27, three years ago and, I am on constant check up, on my dearest best friend... I know she's not feeling too well. She like blood related to me and, that the way I see it. Therefore, I let out a loud scream with, my eyes flooding with tears. So, I begin to run up the stairs, to rely the message to my mom. And that's where I truly broke down, as a call was being made to her mom. I am very sensitive when it comes to souls, and right then and there, my gut kicked in and told me: what went wrong. Should I get in trouble for, holding the truth away from you? Clearly not because the truth never hides. This is where my gut kicks in. So, I hope your ready to hear the truth. She came into my dreams, not once but twice. The first visit was very clearly, her and I shopping...she loved to shop. And in the second, dream was her in a field of yellow flowers. They could almost pass as sunflower. And that's were she said: Good bye. And this was before the situation happened. Now, shall we fast ward to the actual day? I don't mind if we do--- the truth needs to be set free. I'm no fan of nursing home to tell you the truth...of all the horrible stories I have heard. And through telling you this, my gut clearly is very verbal, when I say this: She was murdered by the hands of the nurse. Yes! I only speak the truth so help me God! She was clearly getting better by the days. And was on her way to recovery, until this wrongful act took place. So, now she up in heaven watching us all, while she even telling me these things. And I she not wrong. Poetry corner This poem hits deep into the surface, of my best friend who is in the picture.

Rupture Exposure

I close my eyes just to, hear the rhythm of my heart beat. And to be completely honest with you, I don't hear a steady rhythm at all. I am laying motionless in a daze, hoping that my ears did not give out on me, and here I go panicking. But, I just can't move my body. I can clearly see myself moving about. But, where am I? I am in a state of panic, while I am in this blood cold room. Now I am still laying here motionless, thinking about wether: my life is worth living and, oops goes the Ace of spades. This heart and soul has been tampered with and, now I am thinking: should I even waste time, wondering about life... I have been broken by, the ones who I love. The ones who... dearly close to my heart. I really don't want to pull back scar's after scar's, just to reveal how deeply, you have punctured this soul. So, I am leaving these wounds covered. So, they can finally heal... I never thought a heart could bleed like this before. And I can physically move my body... this heart won't rupture no more. 💔

Picture of strength

When your hurting inside and, you have tried your damnedest to speak. But, every road you take, to voice your pain, gets shut down, your better off keeping it to yourself. So, it can cause more pain then anyone else can imagine. I'm done with short and sweet apologise, with a gift to come with it. And all that does is causes flashback, and more tears. So, I am better off not speaking at this point---whenever I have tried, I get verbally attack. And this soul grows stronger with tears, which you see as a sign of weakness. I have written a letter to God to reach out too--- I am really done with dealing with this mess. Therefore, if you want to cause war between us, I will begin to show you that, I am no longer going to put up with this mess. And no my actions will not be short, nor sweet... throughout those years, I have tried to share with you, and you than shut me down. Therefore, I have found a better alternative and, its not what you think it is. So, you can continue to believe whatever. But, when I finally reach my breaking point, and you don't see me anymore, this will become your biggest regret... once I walk out the door, I am never coming back...this is my final break through.

So long and gone forever

For many years, I have been striving to reach my inner peace. And to truly find out who,what and where I need to be. But, I am always getting slapped in my face, with things that are no longer my problem. So, I have reached about the end of my rope because, I will always hear both sides of the story. And never shone anyone away. But, I have seen through many years of, how the devil works in so many ways. Therefore, I will continue to be who I am setting out to become. And there's no room for two... I have drawn out my journey on my own. People can walk and talk, and say a whole lot of bull. But, I dare you, not one of you can put two and two together, to get a clearer picture. So, when this wick from my candle burns out, I will leave you with something sweet. And that will be the last you will ever hear from me. Like, that quote: what you do behind someone else back, you are doing in front of God eyes, really makes sense to me. But, I will remain silent and, leave the work up to God... Your karma will come in time. And you can say whatever you want. But, my eyes and ears has: seen and heard enough. So, you can take your bitter pill and shallow, while I continue to pray for you... that the right thing to do.

Drifting inside a dream

Its 2 AM and I am lying wide awake in my bed, trying to figure out why, did my body awake me. Now I am feeling all nervous as hell, and my stomach is feeling uneasy, and I can't fall back to sleep so easily. I quickly turn on the lights and, laid there with my eyes fixated on the clock, trying to ramble through all my thoughts... this body has me all shook up. And No! I am not an insomniac. So, you can erase that, thought right out of your head. Two hours have passed and, now these eyes are closing slowly, taking me back into dreamland. I don't know what my body is telling me, is this really a message at all? But, I do know that: this is not my sleep pattern. So, why is my body reacting this way. am I out in a dream, and can someone please tell me what is happening?